Thursday, September 18, 2003

It’s funny how some people are. How some people like to have all attention on them, no matter what the price, or who ends up being the bud of the joke.

Take for example tonight. Picture it: I’m getting out of my car in the parking lot, getting all of my stuff together to walk in to the dorm. The new gym is right beside the dormority; they both share the same parking lot. The group of “black” people come out of the gym. (I say “black” people because these are the African-American’s who believe that to be black you have to wear over seized t-shirts, have your pants hanging around your knees, and say words like, “Right thurr,” and “shauty.”) I’m walking with my happy self, smiling, just walking.

“Person with the backpack, Sedrick likes you!” I hear.
In my head, I think, Ok, I’m the only person walking with a backpack, hmmm, whatever.
“Look at the way that faggot walks.”
Ok, I think, Now I know there talking about me, there’s no one else around, shit!
So what do I do? I keep my little legs movin', I don’t even turn my head around. Maybe if I keep walking, don’t turn around, they won’t notice me and stop talking about me. No such luck, but, I finally reach the door to get inside the dorm, but not without hearing one more comment, “He wears them goddamn muscle shirts just like a fucking faggot.” Ok, first off, this little shirt is from Banana Republic [BITCH] secondly, this is NOT a muscle shirt, fucker! Anyway, I walk into the common room, and head straight for the C-Wing, where my lovely little piece of hell is located.

So, this is what I have to deal with. And you know what really sucks about the whole thing? I’m TOO damn passive aggressive! If I were at Roswell High, I would have whipped around, and given those bastards a real good tongue-lashing. [Not that type!] But here, I just can’t do it. AH! But I feel the anger simmering down their in the pit of my stomach, it’s building, oh yes it’s building, and one day I’m just going to lose it. Then they can really see what a gay person is like; see how bitchy we (not all) can get. Until then I channel my anger to the computer, for this blog, annnnd for the The South Georgian; that’s the school newspaper. I forgot to write in here that I am officially the Editor-in-Chief! Go me! So I have that as an outlet for my anger. But after that little incident, I came to my room, put on my Christina Aguilera cd and banged away at the computer keyboard. AH! The stupidity of people is just amazing. What really gets me is the fact that NONE of them have ever spoken a word to me. Gosh, if you’re going to talk about me, at least introduce yourself! Bitches!

After listening to number 20 (‘Keep on Singin My Song’) from Christina Aguilera’s latest cd, I felt a little better. I just LOVE that song! These lines just get me every time, “I woke up this morning with a smile on my face and nobody’s gonna bring me down today.” “I believe they can take anything from me but they can’t succeed in taking my inner peace from me…they can say all they wanna say about me, but I’m gonna carry on, I’mma keep on singin’ my song” YES girl! (Gay moment) I’mma gonna keep on singin my song and ain’t (yes, I just typed ain’t on purpose) NOBODY gonna take MY inner peace. Oh yes…..