Buzz Late Night Live crew...Average Joe, Spanish Michael, Jamie Lynn and Producer Mike.
Tuesday, February 21, 2006
Sunday, February 19, 2006
Whatever happened to that old-fashioned love? The love that permeated all aspects of your life. The type of love that would make you drop everything for that special someone? The type of love that makes you want to tell the truth? Please prove me wrong. Please make me believe in love again. Please make me believe that “the one” is out there.
Sometimes when starting something new, I over think, I over analyze, I over everything. I’m not really sure how to NOT do that. Maybe deleting the phone number from my contact list will help? So then, I’m not the one always calling. I don’t know, I just don’t understand people.
Grey’s Anatomy is on and it ROCKS! Love that show.
Sometimes when starting something new, I over think, I over analyze, I over everything. I’m not really sure how to NOT do that. Maybe deleting the phone number from my contact list will help? So then, I’m not the one always calling. I don’t know, I just don’t understand people.
Grey’s Anatomy is on and it ROCKS! Love that show.
Friday, February 17, 2006
Wednesday, February 15, 2006
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
Sunday, February 12, 2006
A good weekend, yes. A nice relaxing weekend. Not much happened, but then at the same time a lot did happen.
Friday Kyle came to Statesboro to look for a place to live. Kyle and Laura came up to the studio while the show was still going on. We go until 10pm on Thursday’s and Friday’s because of Club Buzz. But it was cool seeing Kyle again and getting to hang out with Laura. Since the Challenge is still going on, I told them to eat before they came up to the studio since I can’t eat at a restaurant. I can go and sit down at a restaurant, but I just can’t eat the food. After that, we went back to my place and just sat around and talked. They left and I went to sleep. I talked to Corey on the phone before I went to bed.
Corey. A new guy. A nice guy. A guy I can trust. I met him recently and we have been talking a lot and getting to know each other. Because I have been through this many times before, I am being VERY cautious and upfront with him. Usually if I do that, they run. He seems to be very receptive to what I have to say.
Saturday morning I REALLY had to do laundry. Like, I had no more clothes, it was gross. Instead of going to someone’s house, I went to the laundry mat so I could get it over with quickly. On my way to the laundry mat, Corey calls and tells me that we can’t hang out later that evening after originally planned. We were going to hang out after he got off of work, but since he is in management at a restaurant and what not, someone called in so he would have to stay until close. So he asked if we could hang out before he went into work. Um…I was on my way to wash just about every article of clothing I owned, my house looked a mess, and my hair…I’m not EVEN going to go there. Stupidly, I agreed. I told him to give me two hours. So I washed my clothes as quickly as possible. Drove him at break neck speed. Spent 15 minutes vacuuming, putting a few clothes away, cleaning my room, the bathroom and the kitchen. I hopped in the shower, tried to tame my monstrous hair and make myself smell decent. As soon as I got out of the shower and dried my hair, he called saying he was in Statesboro and asking how to get to my apartment. Um…not ENOUGH TIME!! But as I gave him directions, I pulled off the impossible and made my hair and myself look presentable in a record four minute period. I was impressed. He came over and we just hung out and watched TV and what not. We had to leave, but wanted to eat before he left. I can’t eat out. He found that funny, but sad. I had to explain to him the whole challenge situation with the show. But I went with him to get something to eat…okay, I normally don’t post information like I’m about to, but I just want to point out the, um, sweetness of the act and how I have wanted someone to do this for ages. While we were in his car, I was chatting away about something mundane; he puts his hands out as if he wants me to grab it. Questions marks popped up in my mind at first, but instinctively, I placed my hand in hands while I continued to gab about something else. An act so small, but yet so big sent my mind reeling with all sorts of thoughts. I haven’t had a guy do that in, gosh, I can’t remember the last time a guy did that. It was so sweet. But we rode back after he got his food and just chatted about life and what not. He dropped me off in front of my apartment and drove off (not into the sunset though, it was raining). Laura and Kyle were waiting for me, with their own food to eat. They came inside and we just sat around eating (I had a turkey sandwich while they plowed through chicken) and talking. Kyle talked about the dream apartment he had found and how excited he was about it. Later on, after some shopping around the ‘Boro, we all came back and crashed for a little while. Kyle and Laura left later that afternoon. I was left with an empty apartment, but with a head full of thoughts to digest.
Today has been filled with a lot of laziness. Sitting around reading the Sunday AJC, watching the news shows and talking to Corey. Now I’m in the library. I just wrapped up studying for my Public Relations intro class.
Well that’s all for now. I’m sure this week will bring lots of exciting events.
Friday Kyle came to Statesboro to look for a place to live. Kyle and Laura came up to the studio while the show was still going on. We go until 10pm on Thursday’s and Friday’s because of Club Buzz. But it was cool seeing Kyle again and getting to hang out with Laura. Since the Challenge is still going on, I told them to eat before they came up to the studio since I can’t eat at a restaurant. I can go and sit down at a restaurant, but I just can’t eat the food. After that, we went back to my place and just sat around and talked. They left and I went to sleep. I talked to Corey on the phone before I went to bed.
Corey. A new guy. A nice guy. A guy I can trust. I met him recently and we have been talking a lot and getting to know each other. Because I have been through this many times before, I am being VERY cautious and upfront with him. Usually if I do that, they run. He seems to be very receptive to what I have to say.
Saturday morning I REALLY had to do laundry. Like, I had no more clothes, it was gross. Instead of going to someone’s house, I went to the laundry mat so I could get it over with quickly. On my way to the laundry mat, Corey calls and tells me that we can’t hang out later that evening after originally planned. We were going to hang out after he got off of work, but since he is in management at a restaurant and what not, someone called in so he would have to stay until close. So he asked if we could hang out before he went into work. Um…I was on my way to wash just about every article of clothing I owned, my house looked a mess, and my hair…I’m not EVEN going to go there. Stupidly, I agreed. I told him to give me two hours. So I washed my clothes as quickly as possible. Drove him at break neck speed. Spent 15 minutes vacuuming, putting a few clothes away, cleaning my room, the bathroom and the kitchen. I hopped in the shower, tried to tame my monstrous hair and make myself smell decent. As soon as I got out of the shower and dried my hair, he called saying he was in Statesboro and asking how to get to my apartment. Um…not ENOUGH TIME!! But as I gave him directions, I pulled off the impossible and made my hair and myself look presentable in a record four minute period. I was impressed. He came over and we just hung out and watched TV and what not. We had to leave, but wanted to eat before he left. I can’t eat out. He found that funny, but sad. I had to explain to him the whole challenge situation with the show. But I went with him to get something to eat…okay, I normally don’t post information like I’m about to, but I just want to point out the, um, sweetness of the act and how I have wanted someone to do this for ages. While we were in his car, I was chatting away about something mundane; he puts his hands out as if he wants me to grab it. Questions marks popped up in my mind at first, but instinctively, I placed my hand in hands while I continued to gab about something else. An act so small, but yet so big sent my mind reeling with all sorts of thoughts. I haven’t had a guy do that in, gosh, I can’t remember the last time a guy did that. It was so sweet. But we rode back after he got his food and just chatted about life and what not. He dropped me off in front of my apartment and drove off (not into the sunset though, it was raining). Laura and Kyle were waiting for me, with their own food to eat. They came inside and we just sat around eating (I had a turkey sandwich while they plowed through chicken) and talking. Kyle talked about the dream apartment he had found and how excited he was about it. Later on, after some shopping around the ‘Boro, we all came back and crashed for a little while. Kyle and Laura left later that afternoon. I was left with an empty apartment, but with a head full of thoughts to digest.
Today has been filled with a lot of laziness. Sitting around reading the Sunday AJC, watching the news shows and talking to Corey. Now I’m in the library. I just wrapped up studying for my Public Relations intro class.
Well that’s all for now. I’m sure this week will bring lots of exciting events.
Thursday, February 09, 2006
Eh. Way to tired to really write a proper post. But, I am going insane right now. The challenge that we are doing for the show started yesterday. All three of us are giving up something. Jamie Lynn and I are giving up fast food and food from any type of restaurant. Mike is giving up cigarettes. Um. Can I just say that this sucks?! I want a hamburger so bad. lol But it’s cool.
I have a confession: I miss my friends from Douglas terribly…
I have a confession: I miss my friends from Douglas terribly…
Monday, February 06, 2006
Sunday, February 05, 2006
The “writing bug” still has not hit me, but I feel uber bad for not posting. Life has gotten in the way. Of course, I’ve come to many conclusions about my state of mind and the way I run my life so it has been a good couple of weeks.
Classes are going as well as expected when taking 21 hours. Sometimes I feel like I have everything under control, then sometimes I feel like I’m grasping for something to hold onto because I’m falling so fast. I’ve had a test in about all my classes except for one. I think I’ve done well on all of them expect for this darn Law & Ethics class. It’s a bit more challenging than I thought it would be. I just have to change my mind frame and really hunker down to learn this stuff like I did for Rhetoric of Social Movements. I love my Intro to PR class. I think I picked the right minor.
The night show is going well. I think we (Jamie Lynn and Producer Mike) have come to a conclusion on who we want for the co-host position. We held auditions live on air last week. It was fun testing out the chemistry on air with different people. It’s really apparent that not everyone has chemistry. I think with the new person, the show will go in a different direction. Right now Jamie Lynn and I have been stuck in a rut on air. Reading some news, talking about it, laughing, giving away something, and that’s it. We don’t have any bits or REALLY intriguing segments. We need to get more creative, but I don’t know where to start. I feel like whenever I try to get creative and come up with a funny bit, it just isn’t funny. I’m not a funny ha ha let me plan comedy. I’m more of a haha, SOMETIMES my comments are witty, or just stupid, which makes them funny. I’m too serious. Meh. We have a meeting in a bit to talk about everything and do some planning. We shall see what we come up with. In the mean time, I could really go for some French toast….
Any who. Yesterday was the annual Georgia College Press Institute in Macon. It was weird being there with no official home. I wasn’t with The South Georgian and I wasn’t with The George-Anne. I was there. I even had my own little packet with stuff. It just had my name and school on it. Usually it has the school’s name and the newspapers name. I guess they couldn’t put 91.9 The Buzz on it. heh. I was very happy to be able to hand both The South Georgian and The George-Anne their plaques for first place in General Excellence. Both staffs work hard to put out a good product so it’s nice to see them both awarded for the hard work. They Press Association even gave me a little plaque for being President. I feel it’s hugely undeserved since I didn’t do much as President, but it’s really nice. I know my Grandmother and Mother will beam when they see it. That makes it worth it. After everything was said and done with the ceremony, I went and hung out with The South Georgian gang. We went to Barnes & Noble and I saw my old Assistant Manager from the Barnes & Noble in Atlanta. I talked to him for a while about the store back in Atlanta and the stuff that’s going in there now. Afterwards, a whole gang of us went over to Chili’s for lunch. It was SO much fun sitting around and talking like we use to. Futch, Jake, Justin, Kendra, and I can’t remember the other girl’s name. We just sat there for like two hours discussing politics, life, and the culture of America. SOO nice to be talking about stuff like that. God I miss that. Late night conversations in the journalism room about our life’s ambitions, stuff from the past, everything.
Some other stuff that’s happened in the past two weeks:
-The 91.9 The Buzz staff was on the cover of The 11th Hour newspaper. Really cool. They did a whole story on the hostage situation and what not.
-Um…
Crap. Have to go to the station to meet Jamie Lynn and Mike. Have to finish later.
Good day!
Classes are going as well as expected when taking 21 hours. Sometimes I feel like I have everything under control, then sometimes I feel like I’m grasping for something to hold onto because I’m falling so fast. I’ve had a test in about all my classes except for one. I think I’ve done well on all of them expect for this darn Law & Ethics class. It’s a bit more challenging than I thought it would be. I just have to change my mind frame and really hunker down to learn this stuff like I did for Rhetoric of Social Movements. I love my Intro to PR class. I think I picked the right minor.
The night show is going well. I think we (Jamie Lynn and Producer Mike) have come to a conclusion on who we want for the co-host position. We held auditions live on air last week. It was fun testing out the chemistry on air with different people. It’s really apparent that not everyone has chemistry. I think with the new person, the show will go in a different direction. Right now Jamie Lynn and I have been stuck in a rut on air. Reading some news, talking about it, laughing, giving away something, and that’s it. We don’t have any bits or REALLY intriguing segments. We need to get more creative, but I don’t know where to start. I feel like whenever I try to get creative and come up with a funny bit, it just isn’t funny. I’m not a funny ha ha let me plan comedy. I’m more of a haha, SOMETIMES my comments are witty, or just stupid, which makes them funny. I’m too serious. Meh. We have a meeting in a bit to talk about everything and do some planning. We shall see what we come up with. In the mean time, I could really go for some French toast….
Any who. Yesterday was the annual Georgia College Press Institute in Macon. It was weird being there with no official home. I wasn’t with The South Georgian and I wasn’t with The George-Anne. I was there. I even had my own little packet with stuff. It just had my name and school on it. Usually it has the school’s name and the newspapers name. I guess they couldn’t put 91.9 The Buzz on it. heh. I was very happy to be able to hand both The South Georgian and The George-Anne their plaques for first place in General Excellence. Both staffs work hard to put out a good product so it’s nice to see them both awarded for the hard work. They Press Association even gave me a little plaque for being President. I feel it’s hugely undeserved since I didn’t do much as President, but it’s really nice. I know my Grandmother and Mother will beam when they see it. That makes it worth it. After everything was said and done with the ceremony, I went and hung out with The South Georgian gang. We went to Barnes & Noble and I saw my old Assistant Manager from the Barnes & Noble in Atlanta. I talked to him for a while about the store back in Atlanta and the stuff that’s going in there now. Afterwards, a whole gang of us went over to Chili’s for lunch. It was SO much fun sitting around and talking like we use to. Futch, Jake, Justin, Kendra, and I can’t remember the other girl’s name. We just sat there for like two hours discussing politics, life, and the culture of America. SOO nice to be talking about stuff like that. God I miss that. Late night conversations in the journalism room about our life’s ambitions, stuff from the past, everything.
Some other stuff that’s happened in the past two weeks:
-The 91.9 The Buzz staff was on the cover of The 11th Hour newspaper. Really cool. They did a whole story on the hostage situation and what not.
-Um…
Crap. Have to go to the station to meet Jamie Lynn and Mike. Have to finish later.
Good day!
Friday, January 20, 2006
Life has been SUPER busy this week. I really don't have enough time to really write about what's happened. But as usual, I go with a list while the week’s events are still fresh on mind.
-Jason left the night show. VERY sad. But, Jamie Lynn and I have been troopers and have kept the show going. I really wish he would have stayed on the show. But, we finally got imaging on the show which makes it sound so cool.
-The hostage situation at the beginning of the week was sad but cool. The radio station broadcasted for two days straight informing the people of what was going on. I do think that we could have ended the broadcast early instead of going to six, but I still enjoyed the experience and learned a lot. Everyone was so helpful.
-I have no money.
-Went to Savannah last weekend with Edgar, Laura and Brandon. We went to see Hostel, but the movie was sold out so we saw Brokeback Mountain. That was my third time. When Brandon went to buy this ticket, he kept saying, "One for BAREback Mountain." It was too funny for words. We went to Ihop afterwards for a nice dinner and chat.
-Michael is now Producer Mike on the show.
-Hosting the night show has proved to be a bit difficult for me. When Jason was there, all I had to do was read my news, chime in whenever my opinion was needed and just sit there and laugh. Now I have to control the audio board and the flow of the show. Sometimes my scatter brainess is really apparent. It's hard for me to keep on one subject or to remember what I'm talking about. I still have a lot to work on for my "radio persona."
-Scott came over this weekend and we hung out. But of course, he hasn't called me since. Whatever.
-I have no money.
-J is coming today. I'm a bit nervous but excited.
Time for class.
Good day!
-Jason left the night show. VERY sad. But, Jamie Lynn and I have been troopers and have kept the show going. I really wish he would have stayed on the show. But, we finally got imaging on the show which makes it sound so cool.
-The hostage situation at the beginning of the week was sad but cool. The radio station broadcasted for two days straight informing the people of what was going on. I do think that we could have ended the broadcast early instead of going to six, but I still enjoyed the experience and learned a lot. Everyone was so helpful.
-I have no money.
-Went to Savannah last weekend with Edgar, Laura and Brandon. We went to see Hostel, but the movie was sold out so we saw Brokeback Mountain. That was my third time. When Brandon went to buy this ticket, he kept saying, "One for BAREback Mountain." It was too funny for words. We went to Ihop afterwards for a nice dinner and chat.
-Michael is now Producer Mike on the show.
-Hosting the night show has proved to be a bit difficult for me. When Jason was there, all I had to do was read my news, chime in whenever my opinion was needed and just sit there and laugh. Now I have to control the audio board and the flow of the show. Sometimes my scatter brainess is really apparent. It's hard for me to keep on one subject or to remember what I'm talking about. I still have a lot to work on for my "radio persona."
-Scott came over this weekend and we hung out. But of course, he hasn't called me since. Whatever.
-I have no money.
-J is coming today. I'm a bit nervous but excited.
Time for class.
Good day!
Sunday, January 15, 2006
Remember this? It's all the way from 1997. I remember back then that I liked it, but I really didn't understand it until now. Interesting how things take on a whole new meaning when you age.
"Wear sunscreen.
If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.
Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.
Don't worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 p.m. on some idle Tuesday.
Do one thing every day that scares you.
Sing.
Don't be reckless with other people's hearts. Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.
Floss.
Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself.
Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.
Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements.
Stretch.
Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don't.
Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You'll miss them when they're gone.
Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else's.
Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.
Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room.
Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.
Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly.
Get to know your parents. You never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings. They're your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.
Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young.
Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft. Travel.
Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will philander. You, too, will get old. And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.
Respect your elders.
Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out.
Don't mess too much with your hair or by the time you're 40 it will look 85.
Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.
But trust me on the sunscreen."
"Wear sunscreen.
If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.
Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.
Don't worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 p.m. on some idle Tuesday.
Do one thing every day that scares you.
Sing.
Don't be reckless with other people's hearts. Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.
Floss.
Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself.
Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.
Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements.
Stretch.
Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don't.
Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You'll miss them when they're gone.
Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else's.
Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.
Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room.
Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.
Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly.
Get to know your parents. You never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings. They're your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.
Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young.
Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft. Travel.
Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will philander. You, too, will get old. And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.
Respect your elders.
Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out.
Don't mess too much with your hair or by the time you're 40 it will look 85.
Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.
But trust me on the sunscreen."
Thursday, January 12, 2006
Can I just say the cloud has lifted? Even though things are not as I would like them in life, I feel alive again. I’m not sure what’s been going on inside me this week, but I have had an eerie calm about myself. I didn’t even know what to think. My life has changed a bit since last week.
For the first time since I have been in college, I am not working at a newspaper. Well, as an Editor. I hope to still write a few articles or reviews here and there. The day I came back to Statesboro, I was promoted to Assistant Program Director of the radio station. I was, and still am, super excited about it. How cool is that? But, with that and the night show, something had to go. Sadly, being A&E Editor for the G-A had to go. But I think the move was wise. I have worked in newspapers for a while and know that I do not want to do that. Maybe magazines, but not newspapers. With the Assistant Program Director job comes a whole new set of worries and planning, but I love it.
The night show has gotten better each night. The first night we were kind of tired and ho hum. The second night we were good. Tonight I thought we were blazin’ by the end. I think we had engaging conversation and plenty of good talk topics. I feel like I am at home. I LOVE radio. I know this is what I was meant to do. Sadly though, one of the hosts is leaving the show. There are things going down and they aren’t seeing eye to eye with the Programming Director. After Friday, he won’t be on the show anymore. That stinks, like really. He adds SO much to the show, I mean, he is like the glue to the show. Jamie and I are just there to look nice—well her more than me. Ugh. I hope that between now and Friday something changes and he decides to stay with the show. I’m not sure what will happen if he leaves.
So, this whole six classes back to back is a bit painful. Now I’m up to 21 hours for this semester. Lord. Help me.
J is coming next week!
Well I’m off to read for class and sleep.
Good day!
For the first time since I have been in college, I am not working at a newspaper. Well, as an Editor. I hope to still write a few articles or reviews here and there. The day I came back to Statesboro, I was promoted to Assistant Program Director of the radio station. I was, and still am, super excited about it. How cool is that? But, with that and the night show, something had to go. Sadly, being A&E Editor for the G-A had to go. But I think the move was wise. I have worked in newspapers for a while and know that I do not want to do that. Maybe magazines, but not newspapers. With the Assistant Program Director job comes a whole new set of worries and planning, but I love it.
The night show has gotten better each night. The first night we were kind of tired and ho hum. The second night we were good. Tonight I thought we were blazin’ by the end. I think we had engaging conversation and plenty of good talk topics. I feel like I am at home. I LOVE radio. I know this is what I was meant to do. Sadly though, one of the hosts is leaving the show. There are things going down and they aren’t seeing eye to eye with the Programming Director. After Friday, he won’t be on the show anymore. That stinks, like really. He adds SO much to the show, I mean, he is like the glue to the show. Jamie and I are just there to look nice—well her more than me. Ugh. I hope that between now and Friday something changes and he decides to stay with the show. I’m not sure what will happen if he leaves.
So, this whole six classes back to back is a bit painful. Now I’m up to 21 hours for this semester. Lord. Help me.
J is coming next week!
Well I’m off to read for class and sleep.
Good day!
Wednesday, January 11, 2006
Sunday, January 08, 2006
James Blunt is the man.
"You're Beautiful"
My life is brilliant.
My love is pure.
I saw an angel.
Of that I'm sure.
She smiled at me on the subway. She was with another man. But I won't lose no sleep on that,'
Cause I've got a plan.
You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw your face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,'
Cause I'll never be with you.
Yeah, she caught my eye,
As we walked on by.
She could see from my face that I was, Fucking high,
And I don't think that I'll see her again,
But we shared a moment that will last till the end.
You're beautiful. You're beautiful. You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw you face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,'
Cause I'll never be with you.
You're beautiful. You're beautiful.You're beautiful, it's true.
There must be an angel with a smile on her face,
When she thought up that I should be with you.
But it's time to face the truth,
I will never be with you.
Alright, so at the moment I am slightly drunk, or tipsy, which ever way you want to look at it. Even though my brain is slightly awkward, I am still too afraid to say what is on my mind, what has been on my mind.
I love the movie “Garden State.” It’s the best. The soundtrack is even better. A song on the soundtrack is so beautiful and true. It’s by Colin Hay.
"I Just Don't Think I'll Ever Get Over You"
I drink good coffee every morning
Comes from a place thats far away
And when i'm done I feel like talking
Without you here there is less to say
Don't want you thinking I'm unhappy
What is closer to the truth
That if I lived til I was a hundred and two
I just don't think I'll ever get over you
No longer moved to drink strong whiskey
I shook the hand of time and I knew
That if I lived 'till I could no longer climb my stairs
I just don't think I'll ever get over you
A face that dances and it haunts me
With laughter still ringin in my ears
I still find pieces of your presence here
even, even after all these years
I don't want you thinkin that I don't get asked to dinner
Cuz I'm here to say that I sometimes do
And even though I may seem to feel a touch of love
I just don't think I'll ever get over you
If I lived til I was a hundred and two
I just don't think I'll ever get over you
Thank you Jake and Kyle for coming over. It was a nice end to the winter break. Laura, Jake, Kyle, and Danielle made me feel like I had life again. I love my friends. The good true friends you know are going to be there no matter what.
Before break was over, Danielle and I met with the VP of KISS 104 and 95.5 The Beat. It was really cool. He was really intelligent and forthcoming with us about the radio industry. I can’t wait to jump in head first and see what I can do. All in due time.
Before I left Atlanta, J and I hung out. We went for coffee. I ran into Ryan H. there and he gave me a juicy piece of high school gossip. I love it. Then we went to eat. We went walking around a track and looked up at the stars. It was so peaceful. I could have laid there for hours looking at the stars. When I drove him back home, I lost my phone. We went back to the restaurant but couldn’t find it. Then we went to where we were looking at the stars and found it. I was so happy, but ever happier I was in his company. Wow. Someone stop me now.
The radio show starts on Monday. I’m so excited.
My eyes are closing and tears are coming. Time to sleep.
Good day.
I love the movie “Garden State.” It’s the best. The soundtrack is even better. A song on the soundtrack is so beautiful and true. It’s by Colin Hay.
"I Just Don't Think I'll Ever Get Over You"
I drink good coffee every morning
Comes from a place thats far away
And when i'm done I feel like talking
Without you here there is less to say
Don't want you thinking I'm unhappy
What is closer to the truth
That if I lived til I was a hundred and two
I just don't think I'll ever get over you
No longer moved to drink strong whiskey
I shook the hand of time and I knew
That if I lived 'till I could no longer climb my stairs
I just don't think I'll ever get over you
A face that dances and it haunts me
With laughter still ringin in my ears
I still find pieces of your presence here
even, even after all these years
I don't want you thinkin that I don't get asked to dinner
Cuz I'm here to say that I sometimes do
And even though I may seem to feel a touch of love
I just don't think I'll ever get over you
If I lived til I was a hundred and two
I just don't think I'll ever get over you
Thank you Jake and Kyle for coming over. It was a nice end to the winter break. Laura, Jake, Kyle, and Danielle made me feel like I had life again. I love my friends. The good true friends you know are going to be there no matter what.
Before break was over, Danielle and I met with the VP of KISS 104 and 95.5 The Beat. It was really cool. He was really intelligent and forthcoming with us about the radio industry. I can’t wait to jump in head first and see what I can do. All in due time.
Before I left Atlanta, J and I hung out. We went for coffee. I ran into Ryan H. there and he gave me a juicy piece of high school gossip. I love it. Then we went to eat. We went walking around a track and looked up at the stars. It was so peaceful. I could have laid there for hours looking at the stars. When I drove him back home, I lost my phone. We went back to the restaurant but couldn’t find it. Then we went to where we were looking at the stars and found it. I was so happy, but ever happier I was in his company. Wow. Someone stop me now.
The radio show starts on Monday. I’m so excited.
My eyes are closing and tears are coming. Time to sleep.
Good day.
Wednesday, January 04, 2006
Tuesday, January 03, 2006
This break, my time in Atlanta is coming to a close. I am very happy for that. I am ready to get back to my space.
Today was my last day at the Camp Creek Barnes & Noble. Sad day, but not really. It was fun, but time to go. I’m going to try and transfer to the B&N in Savannah. I originally thought I would stay at the B&N here for Spring Break, but I just can’t stay at home that long. This house only needs to be a place where I am a guest.
After work, I went and saw Jessica, Lianne, Justin and all the dogs they have. Special people. I had so much fun hanging out with them over break. I am so taking Justin’s advice and I am going to try my hardest to journal everyday in the other journal. It’s time to really flush some of this stuff out. Anywho, after I hung out them and said my goodbyes, I went and picked up Michael from work. I took him home and we talked a little about our past and what that means. I see Michael as a very important person in my life and we shared a lot of good times when we were together. But, that’s in the past. I think we are two different people with two different lives, I don’t think we would work. But it was fun rehashing the past and talking about it a bit. I left there and came back home, where I sit right now. Ya know, this house is SO freaking cold. lol That was random, but it is. My little toes are freezing, poor things. I have no money.
I am dead broke.
I bought Suze Orman’s book “The Money Book for the Young, Fabulous, and Broke” because honey, I am FABULOUS and VERY Broke. It has been very interesting so far. I think I’m going to learn a lot and come away with great money tips and what not.
Later today Danielle and I will make our way over to WSB to have lunch with a big wig over a couple of COX owned Atlanta radio stations. I hope I don’t say something stupid or trip over a cord. I am so prone to accidents.
Good day!
Today was my last day at the Camp Creek Barnes & Noble. Sad day, but not really. It was fun, but time to go. I’m going to try and transfer to the B&N in Savannah. I originally thought I would stay at the B&N here for Spring Break, but I just can’t stay at home that long. This house only needs to be a place where I am a guest.
After work, I went and saw Jessica, Lianne, Justin and all the dogs they have. Special people. I had so much fun hanging out with them over break. I am so taking Justin’s advice and I am going to try my hardest to journal everyday in the other journal. It’s time to really flush some of this stuff out. Anywho, after I hung out them and said my goodbyes, I went and picked up Michael from work. I took him home and we talked a little about our past and what that means. I see Michael as a very important person in my life and we shared a lot of good times when we were together. But, that’s in the past. I think we are two different people with two different lives, I don’t think we would work. But it was fun rehashing the past and talking about it a bit. I left there and came back home, where I sit right now. Ya know, this house is SO freaking cold. lol That was random, but it is. My little toes are freezing, poor things. I have no money.
I am dead broke.
I bought Suze Orman’s book “The Money Book for the Young, Fabulous, and Broke” because honey, I am FABULOUS and VERY Broke. It has been very interesting so far. I think I’m going to learn a lot and come away with great money tips and what not.
Later today Danielle and I will make our way over to WSB to have lunch with a big wig over a couple of COX owned Atlanta radio stations. I hope I don’t say something stupid or trip over a cord. I am so prone to accidents.
Good day!
Monday, January 02, 2006
Weird day. Well not weird, just weird things happened.
So, I woke up, begrudgingly with a wicked hang over from the hard partying I did to ring in the New Year. (Sarcasm anyone?) I woke up, went on over to B&N and started selling books. The strangest thing happened. I could have SWORN I saw Scott in the store. I never met him in person, but that’s how I imagined he would look like in real life. Hmmm…any who, that kind of sent my mind into a thinking frenzy—that’s always painful for the old brain. Ha. But yeah, that whole Scott situation was weird. He just stopped calling. Like, we talked on the phone one day and then I never heard from him again. I’m so curious as to what happened. I can be such a loser at times. I always want to take a lesson away from a situation and I would love to know what happened.
Any who, last night, when everyone was ringing in the New Year, I got tipsy phone calls from Douglas peeps. Samantha B. called and chatted for a bit. Then she handed the phone to Pepijn who handed the phone to Drew who handed the phone to Jake. It was fun listening to them all talk about the nights events. I also heard from J a little after the stroke of midnight. Earlier in the day, Samantha N. called from Iran to wish me a Happy New Year. She was at the Zimbabwe Embassy with her family celebrating. How posh. I was all class with my ratty t-shirt and shorts on the couch watching Anderson Cooper and then the movie “Four Brothers.”
Tonight, after my weird day at work, J and I went out for a bit of fun. Fun included Wendy’s and another viewing of “Brokeback Mountain.” It was cool hanging out. We talked about his visit to the ‘Boro in a couple of weeks. I am so bad at planning things to do. We shall see though.
I am due in at work in a few hours—9 am. I am going to hate myself when it’s time to wake up.
Off to sleep land.
Good day!
So, I woke up, begrudgingly with a wicked hang over from the hard partying I did to ring in the New Year. (Sarcasm anyone?) I woke up, went on over to B&N and started selling books. The strangest thing happened. I could have SWORN I saw Scott in the store. I never met him in person, but that’s how I imagined he would look like in real life. Hmmm…any who, that kind of sent my mind into a thinking frenzy—that’s always painful for the old brain. Ha. But yeah, that whole Scott situation was weird. He just stopped calling. Like, we talked on the phone one day and then I never heard from him again. I’m so curious as to what happened. I can be such a loser at times. I always want to take a lesson away from a situation and I would love to know what happened.
Any who, last night, when everyone was ringing in the New Year, I got tipsy phone calls from Douglas peeps. Samantha B. called and chatted for a bit. Then she handed the phone to Pepijn who handed the phone to Drew who handed the phone to Jake. It was fun listening to them all talk about the nights events. I also heard from J a little after the stroke of midnight. Earlier in the day, Samantha N. called from Iran to wish me a Happy New Year. She was at the Zimbabwe Embassy with her family celebrating. How posh. I was all class with my ratty t-shirt and shorts on the couch watching Anderson Cooper and then the movie “Four Brothers.”
Tonight, after my weird day at work, J and I went out for a bit of fun. Fun included Wendy’s and another viewing of “Brokeback Mountain.” It was cool hanging out. We talked about his visit to the ‘Boro in a couple of weeks. I am so bad at planning things to do. We shall see though.
I am due in at work in a few hours—9 am. I am going to hate myself when it’s time to wake up.
Off to sleep land.
Good day!
Sunday, January 01, 2006
Kool and the Gang, Anderson Cooper and Drag Queens
Happy New Year!
Um, so my night wasn’t the most exciting, but it was peaceful – which is much needed.
I’ve been
watching the CNN coverage of New Years, mostly because it’s CNN and secondly because the John Mayer Trio is performing on the show. I loves me some John Mayer.
New Year’s resolution? Not sure. Be happy. Be successful. The normal stuff, ya know? I’ll have to think about it a little more.
Right now Harry Conick is talking about Katrina and the impact on New Orleans. I wonder if his music is any good…
Alright, well I’ve got to be in at work in the morning, I know, working on New Years Day. But it’s time and half pay and someone needs to sell the world books, right? Indeed.
Good day!
Happy New Year!
Um, so my night wasn’t the most exciting, but it was peaceful – which is much needed.
I’ve been
watching the CNN coverage of New Years, mostly because it’s CNN and secondly because the John Mayer Trio is performing on the show. I loves me some John Mayer.New Year’s resolution? Not sure. Be happy. Be successful. The normal stuff, ya know? I’ll have to think about it a little more.
Right now Harry Conick is talking about Katrina and the impact on New Orleans. I wonder if his music is any good…
Alright, well I’ve got to be in at work in the morning, I know, working on New Years Day. But it’s time and half pay and someone needs to sell the world books, right? Indeed.
Good day!
Saturday, December 31, 2005
The holidays are almost over. Thank God. Life can get back to normal and people can stop pretending to like each other. HA! I’m supposed to be an optimist…
This break has been a busy one. I’ve been visiting, working, running around getting things done. I’ve also spent A LOT of money. Too much actually. But meh, you only live once, right?
Let’s see…this week has been especially entertaining. I got to hang out with long time (like middle school) friend Jessica. I went up to her sister, Lianne, and fiancés, Justin, house Monday and Tuesday and hung out. The first night I went, I spent a few hours talking to Justin. WOW. This guy is very insightful. He’s going to make a great creative coach one day. We talked a lot about recent situations in my life and what I need to do to start afresh. I walked away from that meeting feeling very empowered. I went and hung out with J afterwards. We went and saw ‘Wolf Creek.’ Do NOT see this movie. That was a total waste of two hours of my life. The whole first hour of the film doesn’t make any sense and doesn’t add to the movie. It was so disappointing. From the trailer, the movie looked really good. How wrong I was. After J and I hung out, I went back over to Lianne and Justin’s to hang out some more. I ended up staying the night. Before we all went to bed, Adam, an old friend of Lianne’s from high school came over. He was really cool. The second night, Tuesday, I ended up doing the same thing. Just going over there and hanging out.
Thursday night, after I got off of work, J and I met up to exchange Christmas presents. I normally don’t buy presents for friends and ask them not to buy me anything. Most of my friends are as broke as I am, so I would rather people spend their money somewhere else, ya know? But J said a couple of weeks ago that he had started buying stuff for my present. Stuff, as in plural—there were several presents. I went into “creative” mode trying to think of things to get him. Since I had a talk with him earlier in the week telling him how I needed to get over him (that’s a long story I just don’t have the energy to get into), I didn’t want to get to mushy with the presents. But I went with: A Starbucks gift card because that’s where we first met, the “40-year-old Virgin’ on DVD because that’s the first movie we saw together, a poet’s journal so he can write down all the poems, drawings, and thoughts he’s having during the day when his laptop isn’t around and finally, a copy of my all-time favorite book, “A Density of Souls.” So, I guess that was okay. He seemed to like it all. I was VERY excited by what he got me…A Budweiser beer (it’s because I don’t drink and need to “loosen” up. lol), a really nice card with a cute message inside that almost made me tear up, his favorite book “100 Years of Solitude.” I can’t wait to start reading that book. I’ve heard so much about it, but I have never gotten around to actually reading the book. Like J wrote in the inside flap, Oprah liked it, so it must be damn good. And finally, he bought me a candle lantern. His Grandmother, on her deathbed, gave me something similar and told him a nice story about it. He found a replica of the lantern and gave it to me and told me the same thing his Grandmother told me about it. I almost lost it when he told me this. We were sitting in the back of IHOP exchanging gifts at like 1am. We must have looked a mess. A black and Mexican man exchanging gifts in the Roswell IHOP. Lovely. I loved all the presents. Well, he sure is making it hard for me to stop “pining” over him. Goodness.
Afterwards, it was like two something in the morning and I didn’t feel like driving all the way home, so Michael let me stay at his apartment. We got to talk and catch up. Then it was back to work in the afternoon. I think I’ve spent more time at Barnes & Noble than I have at home. lol
I’m actually really excited because I’m going back to the ‘boro this Wednesday. I can’t wait to get back in my bed and stand in my shower. I love having my own apartment. Just grand I tell you.
New Years Eve is today, right now. What will I be doing tonight to ring in the New Year? Well, first I’ll start the evening off at a fancy shin dig. It’s this place called Barnes & Noble. I hear it’s all the rage this year. Meh. But yeah, I’m working tonight. I don’t have plans for tonight, but who knows what will pop up. I still have to be back at the bookstore on New Years day at 1pm. I don’t mind at all seeing as how that is time and a half pay for a holiday. I am not complaining having to work on New Years Day. Hell, I’d even work a double if someone wanted me to. I likes the money!!
My eyes are dropping and I still want to read a little more of this book I’m reading so I can get to J’s book.
Good day!
Happy New Year!
This break has been a busy one. I’ve been visiting, working, running around getting things done. I’ve also spent A LOT of money. Too much actually. But meh, you only live once, right?
Let’s see…this week has been especially entertaining. I got to hang out with long time (like middle school) friend Jessica. I went up to her sister, Lianne, and fiancés, Justin, house Monday and Tuesday and hung out. The first night I went, I spent a few hours talking to Justin. WOW. This guy is very insightful. He’s going to make a great creative coach one day. We talked a lot about recent situations in my life and what I need to do to start afresh. I walked away from that meeting feeling very empowered. I went and hung out with J afterwards. We went and saw ‘Wolf Creek.’ Do NOT see this movie. That was a total waste of two hours of my life. The whole first hour of the film doesn’t make any sense and doesn’t add to the movie. It was so disappointing. From the trailer, the movie looked really good. How wrong I was. After J and I hung out, I went back over to Lianne and Justin’s to hang out some more. I ended up staying the night. Before we all went to bed, Adam, an old friend of Lianne’s from high school came over. He was really cool. The second night, Tuesday, I ended up doing the same thing. Just going over there and hanging out.
Thursday night, after I got off of work, J and I met up to exchange Christmas presents. I normally don’t buy presents for friends and ask them not to buy me anything. Most of my friends are as broke as I am, so I would rather people spend their money somewhere else, ya know? But J said a couple of weeks ago that he had started buying stuff for my present. Stuff, as in plural—there were several presents. I went into “creative” mode trying to think of things to get him. Since I had a talk with him earlier in the week telling him how I needed to get over him (that’s a long story I just don’t have the energy to get into), I didn’t want to get to mushy with the presents. But I went with: A Starbucks gift card because that’s where we first met, the “40-year-old Virgin’ on DVD because that’s the first movie we saw together, a poet’s journal so he can write down all the poems, drawings, and thoughts he’s having during the day when his laptop isn’t around and finally, a copy of my all-time favorite book, “A Density of Souls.” So, I guess that was okay. He seemed to like it all. I was VERY excited by what he got me…A Budweiser beer (it’s because I don’t drink and need to “loosen” up. lol), a really nice card with a cute message inside that almost made me tear up, his favorite book “100 Years of Solitude.” I can’t wait to start reading that book. I’ve heard so much about it, but I have never gotten around to actually reading the book. Like J wrote in the inside flap, Oprah liked it, so it must be damn good. And finally, he bought me a candle lantern. His Grandmother, on her deathbed, gave me something similar and told him a nice story about it. He found a replica of the lantern and gave it to me and told me the same thing his Grandmother told me about it. I almost lost it when he told me this. We were sitting in the back of IHOP exchanging gifts at like 1am. We must have looked a mess. A black and Mexican man exchanging gifts in the Roswell IHOP. Lovely. I loved all the presents. Well, he sure is making it hard for me to stop “pining” over him. Goodness.
Afterwards, it was like two something in the morning and I didn’t feel like driving all the way home, so Michael let me stay at his apartment. We got to talk and catch up. Then it was back to work in the afternoon. I think I’ve spent more time at Barnes & Noble than I have at home. lol
I’m actually really excited because I’m going back to the ‘boro this Wednesday. I can’t wait to get back in my bed and stand in my shower. I love having my own apartment. Just grand I tell you.
New Years Eve is today, right now. What will I be doing tonight to ring in the New Year? Well, first I’ll start the evening off at a fancy shin dig. It’s this place called Barnes & Noble. I hear it’s all the rage this year. Meh. But yeah, I’m working tonight. I don’t have plans for tonight, but who knows what will pop up. I still have to be back at the bookstore on New Years day at 1pm. I don’t mind at all seeing as how that is time and a half pay for a holiday. I am not complaining having to work on New Years Day. Hell, I’d even work a double if someone wanted me to. I likes the money!!
My eyes are dropping and I still want to read a little more of this book I’m reading so I can get to J’s book.
Good day!
Happy New Year!
Monday, December 26, 2005
What’s that saying Morgan always uses when she makes a mistake? “Goddamn, I suck at life!” I feel like that, somewhat.
I finished reading “Back Where He Started” the other day. WONDERFUL book. Fabulous book. I really connected with the main character Chris. Not that I would know what it’s like to be a 49 year old white gay man, but the personal struggles he went through. The family that he built, that he worked so hard to keep and maintain, I want that. Something else that really stuck out to me is the relationship between Chris and Steve. The two most unlikely people end up being perfect for each other. And here’s the catch—they were honest with each other. They told each other what they expected and communicated. Chris was able to move on from a 22 year relationship and find his soul mate. As Chris said in the book, he had to move away from the long relationship “cold turkey.” I think it’s time for me to do that. I do not know what I’m doing. Pining away for someone that is clearly unavailable and not interested in a romantic relationship. I’ve got to leave that alone, cold turkey. I don’t want to, but if I keep playing with this fire, it will consume me whole and no fire fighter will be able to save me. God I ache for this person. Now, in the manual for being human, what page is the “Turn Feelings ON and OFF” on? I really need to read that so I can turn these feelings on and off.
Have you ever had a person in your life that really liked you? I mean, they let you know every time they were around you that they were interested. They would turn simple jokes into innuendo about their feelings toward you. Well, I think I am that person. I am that person who does that now and it just makes my skin crawl quite frankly. So gross. I just can’t let go.
Christmas was yesterday. Another Christmas, another day with the family. This time one of my older cousins hosted Christmas dinner. It was very nice. She and her husband had it in the clubhouse of their apartments. The setting was nice and cozy.
I gave my Grandmother the Oprah 20th anniversary DVD. I think I liked it more than she did! I stayed up last night watching a lot of the DVD. Can I just say that I love Oprah? I mean, this woman has it together and she has had it together. The “thing” or spark that I think makes Oprah so successful is her faith and heart. She actually has a heart and no secret agendas. She genuinely loves people and enjoys the connection that humans enjoy. If only I could be at peace with myself like that. I think I will make a top 5 list soon of the women I admire. There are just so many women who do so much good in the world. I love it.
Well, I have to be at B&N at 5am to mark books and crap down for the after Christmas sale. YAY for waking up early. The whole process would be so much better if I had my iPod…
Good day!
I finished reading “Back Where He Started” the other day. WONDERFUL book. Fabulous book. I really connected with the main character Chris. Not that I would know what it’s like to be a 49 year old white gay man, but the personal struggles he went through. The family that he built, that he worked so hard to keep and maintain, I want that. Something else that really stuck out to me is the relationship between Chris and Steve. The two most unlikely people end up being perfect for each other. And here’s the catch—they were honest with each other. They told each other what they expected and communicated. Chris was able to move on from a 22 year relationship and find his soul mate. As Chris said in the book, he had to move away from the long relationship “cold turkey.” I think it’s time for me to do that. I do not know what I’m doing. Pining away for someone that is clearly unavailable and not interested in a romantic relationship. I’ve got to leave that alone, cold turkey. I don’t want to, but if I keep playing with this fire, it will consume me whole and no fire fighter will be able to save me. God I ache for this person. Now, in the manual for being human, what page is the “Turn Feelings ON and OFF” on? I really need to read that so I can turn these feelings on and off.
Have you ever had a person in your life that really liked you? I mean, they let you know every time they were around you that they were interested. They would turn simple jokes into innuendo about their feelings toward you. Well, I think I am that person. I am that person who does that now and it just makes my skin crawl quite frankly. So gross. I just can’t let go.
Christmas was yesterday. Another Christmas, another day with the family. This time one of my older cousins hosted Christmas dinner. It was very nice. She and her husband had it in the clubhouse of their apartments. The setting was nice and cozy.
I gave my Grandmother the Oprah 20th anniversary DVD. I think I liked it more than she did! I stayed up last night watching a lot of the DVD. Can I just say that I love Oprah? I mean, this woman has it together and she has had it together. The “thing” or spark that I think makes Oprah so successful is her faith and heart. She actually has a heart and no secret agendas. She genuinely loves people and enjoys the connection that humans enjoy. If only I could be at peace with myself like that. I think I will make a top 5 list soon of the women I admire. There are just so many women who do so much good in the world. I love it.
Well, I have to be at B&N at 5am to mark books and crap down for the after Christmas sale. YAY for waking up early. The whole process would be so much better if I had my iPod…
Good day!
Saturday, December 24, 2005
Reading a new book, "Back Where He Started" by Jay Quinn and loving every word. Why can't life be like a book? Well this book at least.
I saw "Brokeback Mountain" last week. WONDERFUL film. I cried, laughed and cheered (to myself of course) during the film. Heath and Jake are awesome in the movie. J and I finally made it to the Midtown area to see the movie...speaking of him...
Lord knows I have written a lot of words about him in this journal. I just don't know. Earlier I was talking to a dear friend about the whole situation. I just felt sad and confused all over again. Sad over the fact that I still want him badly and will never get him and confused over what he thinks, if anything at all, over the situation. He’s so ambiguous about everything, I never really know what he’s thinking or what is agenda is. Maybe I should pull out Burke’s Pentad and try to find the underlying motive. Dr. G would be so proud. But I will tell you this, I am tired of thinking about the situation and I’m pretty sure he’s tired of me alluding to stuff. See, but that’s the other thing — I never know if he’s catching on to the questions I ask or the things I’m saying. I don’t think this situation is as big and important in his head as it is to me. Eh…what’s a queer to do?
Well, I do know that I love this book I’m reading and plan on staying up for another hour to read more.
Merry Christmas Eve!
Good day.
I saw "Brokeback Mountain" last week. WONDERFUL film. I cried, laughed and cheered (to myself of course) during the film. Heath and Jake are awesome in the movie. J and I finally made it to the Midtown area to see the movie...speaking of him...
Lord knows I have written a lot of words about him in this journal. I just don't know. Earlier I was talking to a dear friend about the whole situation. I just felt sad and confused all over again. Sad over the fact that I still want him badly and will never get him and confused over what he thinks, if anything at all, over the situation. He’s so ambiguous about everything, I never really know what he’s thinking or what is agenda is. Maybe I should pull out Burke’s Pentad and try to find the underlying motive. Dr. G would be so proud. But I will tell you this, I am tired of thinking about the situation and I’m pretty sure he’s tired of me alluding to stuff. See, but that’s the other thing — I never know if he’s catching on to the questions I ask or the things I’m saying. I don’t think this situation is as big and important in his head as it is to me. Eh…what’s a queer to do?
Well, I do know that I love this book I’m reading and plan on staying up for another hour to read more.
Merry Christmas Eve!
Good day.
Thursday, December 22, 2005
I would love to make this a long post, but I’m too tired. Tonight should have been a horrible night - thanks to a certain family member. I haven’t been this upset in a long time. I called J and he was there for me. We spent a few hours at WaHo (is that the proper slang for that place?) talking about our families and all that good stuff. Before eating, we went over to the jukebox and picked a few songs…he picked, as he described it “our song,” “You Mean the World to Me” by Toni Braxton. I don’t know. I don’t really want to think right now. I just want to swim in this bliss for a few more hours while I sleep.
Oasis had it right in their song “Wonderwall”...
"Today is gonna be the day
That they're gonna throw it back to you
By now
you should've somehow
Realized what you gotta do
I don't believe that
anybody
Feels the way I do about you now
Backbeat the word was on the
street
That the fire in your heart is out
I'm sure you've heard it all
before
But you never really had a doubt
I don't believe that anybody
feels
The way I do about you now
And all the roads we have to walk along
are winding
And all the lights that lead us there are blinding
There are
many things that I would like to say to you
I don't know how
Because
maybe
You're gonna be the one who saves me?
And after all your my
wonderwall
Today was gonna be the day
But they'll never throw it back to
you
By now you should've somehow
Realized what you're not to do
I
don't believe that anybody
Feels the way I do about you now
And all the
roads that lead to you were winding
And all the lights that light the way
are blinding
There are many things that I would like to
say to you
I don't know how I said maybe
You're gonna be the one who saves me?
And after all you're my wonderwall I said maybe
You're gonna be the one who saves me?
And after all
you're my wonderwall
Said maybe you're gonna be the one that saves me
You're gonna be the one that saves me
You're gonna be the one that saves me."
Oasis had it right in their song “Wonderwall”...
"Today is gonna be the day
That they're gonna throw it back to you
By now
you should've somehow
Realized what you gotta do
I don't believe that
anybody
Feels the way I do about you now
Backbeat the word was on the
street
That the fire in your heart is out
I'm sure you've heard it all
before
But you never really had a doubt
I don't believe that anybody
feels
The way I do about you now
And all the roads we have to walk along
are winding
And all the lights that lead us there are blinding
There are
many things that I would like to say to you
I don't know how
Because
maybe
You're gonna be the one who saves me?
And after all your my
wonderwall
Today was gonna be the day
But they'll never throw it back to
you
By now you should've somehow
Realized what you're not to do
I
don't believe that anybody
Feels the way I do about you now
And all the
roads that lead to you were winding
And all the lights that light the way
are blinding
There are many things that I would like to
say to you
I don't know how I said maybe
You're gonna be the one who saves me?
And after all you're my wonderwall I said maybe
You're gonna be the one who saves me?
And after all
you're my wonderwall
Said maybe you're gonna be the one that saves me
You're gonna be the one that saves me
You're gonna be the one that saves me."
